i’m pretty sure this twitter account is how sexting works in night vale
i mean really
what is going on here
but how am i supposed to know the world is fucked up if banksy doesn’t spray paint it on a public wall
the great thing about coffee: it cures exhaustion at 11 pm and enables you to write a bomb ass paper
The bad thing about coffee: it’s now 3 am and the only thing I want to do is cha cha real smooth
i cant believe caffeine was the only drug i was on when i wrote this
me: have a great day!
customer: i wanted a cheese danish
John Mulaney | The Salt & Pepper Diner
THE BEST JOKE IN EXISTENCE
GOD I JUST TOLD SOMEONE ABOUT THIS STORY
This is one of the best pieces of comedy that I have ever had the pleasure of witnessing. I love this. I have been looking for this online for awhile.
i hate these cookies
Go fuck yourself, you piece of shit. You’re the reason society is crumbling. In 20 years, New York is going to be a pile of ash and dust because people like you exist. This is why I fucking hate tubmlr.
So @TheCapitolPN tweeted this
which was promptly deleted. (G-Bb-A-D are the notes to Rue’s whistle.)
But if you had clicked inspect element before it was deleted
"You silence our voices, but we are still heard."
HOW COOL IS THIS MARKETING?!?! Like the rebels are hacking into the capitol’s twitter!!!!